would someone please re-supply me with my social energy?

Yesterday was so strange I woke up feeling fine and then as the day progressed I slipped further and further into feeling void of any social energy. I know it's part of the whole grieving thing but I am not liking this ride... I want to get off.

I've always had this over-nurturing trait... the one that causes me to worry about everyone else's well being regardless if it compromises my own. I often wish I could be a little more self centered or perhaps not so easily affected but other people's moods or actions. I always find myself trying to please everyone to no end. I know it's not healthy, and I know I just can't do it all the time- everything in moderation... especially now that I have this grief to process. My friends are wonderful they recognize this in me and are so swell to help me get over this. I am so fortunate but sometimes times the clock ticks so very very slowly.

the work atmosphere seems to be straining at the seams... so many people are showing the tell tale signs of jumping ship... it's so unsettling, ah well at least it's been beautiful weather all week so far.

Tennis lessons tonight. I'm happy to have that to look forward to.... I will one day fly I will I will